I have been feeling the same way. I was excited until reality hit when certain people wouldn’t cooperate, I had to fire two planners, and on top of it all everything just seems to be so expensive. I am excited about marrying my “God-Sent” but everything else is just a show for others.

Once you cover the legalities for your area and any religious requirements you may wish to honor, do you know what a wedding has to include? Absolutely nothing. Do you know what it may include? Nearly anything you like that isn’t actively illegal in your vicinity.

If you understand that, then it frees you to design the celebration you’d like at the price tag you can afford. Hate cake? Don’t have one. Band too expensive? You can hook your iPod up to speakers that will give you all the music you need. Think the traditional big, poofy white gown is wasteful and ridiculous? Wear something else. Would you really prefer to make the day an intimate celebration between you and your beloved? Just make sure you invite the requisite number of witnesses for your area and spread the good news later.

Don’t spend thousands of dollars on a party you won’t enjoy. Either throw the party you’d like to attend, or save your money and don’t bother with all the fuss. Either way, it’s up to you.

I COMPLETELY feel your pain! It’s so nice to know I’m not the only one who feels like this. I feel like people think I’m terrible when I say I’m not excited about planning a wedding. What have you decided to do? I just got engaged on 9/1 and am planning a “wedding” for 5/2. Any suggestions?

I agree with you LaGail and Twistie wedding is just a ceremony for two persons who would like to spend the rest of their lives together…and not a party for other people.

I’m getting married in few days ahead…though there’s a plan of having a church wedding…I think my wish of having it solemnly with just few important persons around would be pursued…a civil wedding as they call it is what i like…after all wedding is only a celebration.. what matter’s most is the life you’re going to spend right after the celebration.

I feel the same way too, I wonder why i’ m not excited, i cant wait to be married, but i also cant wait 4 the day to come and go.

I totally agree with all of you. I’ve been miserable for the last six months and can’t wait until the day after the wedding. Hopefully I won’t see any more relatives for a while!

I feel exactly the same, and trying to decide whether to have a wedding at all.

I’m definitely marrying the right person, but really don’t understand why I should spend thousands of my own money on a one-day party for other people. And when I told people when we got engaged that we would elope, everyone acted so disappointed and critical, it was like they could only be excited about our engagement if we were throwing THEM a wedding to attend.

I feel a bit jealous of the girls who really enjoy this and get so much excitement from it, though I repress that feeling most of the time. Their joy and excitement looks fun. But maybe they also aren’t paying for it themselves or to them this somehow is the most value they are going to get out of their money. I figure I’m going to get an awful lot of joy out of having money to retire with or having money to take six honeymoons with, rather than blowing it on one day.

Another thing I am experiencing and wish I could sort out — I don’t really see how it matters if we elope or do something at all. I don’t understand the point of a wedding in a way, except for the legal aspect; we’ve already vowed to one another our commitment and promised in our hearts and spiritually to be one, together, always. And we already live together in a house we bought. How is the day after our wedding going to be any different from the day before? And the ceremony seems like a bit of a charade, aside from the legal aspect.

I wish I could be excited about it. It all seems like more of an unnecessary obligation to spend money than a celebration.

I was always over-excited when my friends got engaged, I got so much joy out of hearing thier planning details and seeing where I could help and couldnt wait to plan my own! Now that I’m engaged, its been 3 months and I’m over it! And I feel so bad but all this worrying about costs and that it’s so expensive is just pissing me off! it’s like suppliers rip you off on purpose because you have to spend the money and there’s nothing you can do about it. I wish I could be more excited!

My sister does not seem excited about her wedding. Everytime we talk about it, she seems annoyed and keeps saying that she just wants to keep it simple & “get it over with.” If she doesn’t want to have a ceremony or gathering, she could go to the JP. I support her decision. I’m starting to feel like it’s an “obligation” since she doesn’t seem excited. I have to take time from my work schedule, spend $300.00 on a flight, and 100.00 a night on a hotel to be there. I keep thinking what is the point of her having it, if she is not excited.

I feel the same way. I have truly enjoyed the wedding planning, but wish we didn’t have such a long engagement. 13 months is too long and now I feel depressed, angry, and sad. All that family has said and done, family expectations, the money, and the stress has gotten me down. I did this for me and my fiancee, but everyone seems to think it is for them.

Glad to know I’m not the only one that doesn’t want a wedding. I would want to elope and go on a fabulous vacation with my husband, buy a house, buy new furniture, but he wants the wedding. I’m so miserable that even talking wedding plans puts me in a bad mood. I’ve started calling it his wedding since I virtually want nothing to do with it. All I hear is cha-ching, cha-ching. I cannot for the life of my grasp the concept of spending SO MUCH money for only a few hours!!
The funny thing is, is that I’m an event planner for a living, so planning a wedding is like being at work. Its not fun to “work” constantly. Especially on a wedding that your not interested in having in the first place. I don’t know HOW I’m going to get through this!!

I am very happy about my up coming wedding on september 25th , but i am getting no real cooperation from the wedding party. the groomsmen have not even gotten fitted for their tuxes and one the brides maids does not even have her dress yet. I contue to try to contact them with no response. so , I have no chose , but to give them a time limit that either their in the wedding or not. the procrastination is making me very pissed off.

I’m also not excited but for different reasons. The dream wedding that I so wanted is being whittled down to a blah wedding. It’s not MY wedding anymore so why should I be excited about my parents and future-inlaws wedding? I’m dreading the next year. I’m sure it’s going to be full of compromises so that the whole wedding looks like crap. Silver lining in the cloud is that I am marrying my true love :0) In the end that’s all that matters.