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So…Does That Mean I Can’t Bring a Date?
I thought I was done ranting about guests inviting others to the wedding but I’m not. Frankly I am really tired of it and I don’t understand why people think it’s ok to just add two or three or four people to the RSVP list.
I was talking about this to one of my friends that had not yet RSVPed and I told him not to bring anyone to the wedding. I could have said it in a nice way but I wasn’t feeling very nice so I said “don’t roll into my wedding with a posse of your homies- ok”.
Then I felt like I may have been a little harsh so I went on to explain why. I explained how I was so annoyed that people were acting as if this was free. I mentioned how we weren’t sure we were even going to have enough space for everyone. And I explained how the guest list has ballooned out of control due to people’s lack of etiquette. He said “cool” so I thought he understood.
Imagine my surprise when the next thing he said was “so does that mean I can’t bring a date?”
“Excuse me?” I said.
“I’m just checking….” was his response.
I’m sure you can imagine my reaction.
[...] Q: People just assume that because we are friends they are automatically invited to the wedding. How do I tell them that’s not so? A: That depends on the circumstances and how comfortable you are at telling people no. When I planned on having a very, very, small wedding (less than 10 guests) someone who I am not that close with asked me if she could come and bring a date. I was so put off by this, and I wanted to say something really snarky, but I didn’t. I said: ” I’d love to have you there but this is a small wedding and I am not sure how the space issue will work out but I’ll let you know.” That bought me some time to really think about how to say no when the time came. But if someone is really your friend, you should be able to tell them honestly what’s going on. I do it all of the time. [...]