Q: I think you were the bride blogger that didn’t have a wedding party. I was wondering how did you deal with that because I don’t have one, and people are driving me nuts. It’s like my wedding isn’t valid or something. People are calling me odd and saying things about my wedding. Did you go through that?

A: Yes. I got all kinds of unsolicited advice. But I am used to that since I run my life how I feel is best, and that doesn’t necessarily coincide with traditional standards.

I wanted our wedding to be about us. I didn’t have time for silly bridesmaid nonsense, I didn’t want the stress about what people were going to wear, how their hair was, if they were at rehearsal, and all the other things that I find to be completely unnecessary for a wedding.

The worst response I got was people thinking I was pregnant so that’s why I didn’t want a wedding party. I don’t know where that connection came from, but my hairdresser said, “No bridesmaids? What is this a shotgun wedding?”

My mental response was, “yes, you idiot, I am getting married 6 months from now because this is a shotgun wedding.” My verbal response was, “ummm no”.

Then there was my grandma who couldn’t understand why I didn’t want my sister in the wedding. She thought I was being mean and she pleaded and pleaded with me to let my sister be in it. Grandma can always make me crack, so I talked to my sister and she said she didn’t want to be in it because she understood why I wanted my wedding the way I did.

So my advice to you is just to smile and nod. People will always want to run their mouths about what you do. They’ll get over it and I bet once they are at the wedding you’ll be so beautiful that they won’t even notice.

Trust me, having a wedding party adds a lot more drama and stress than not having one.

Q: What do you do when people keep asking you if you think you are too young to get married?

A: I’m not one for listening to the crowd, but sometimes the crowd makes good points. Maybe you are too young, maybe you aren’t but don’t be so stubborn as to not listen to good advice.

However, sometimes you have to tune out the chatter and do what is best for you. If you have prepared for this marriage by asking important questions, taking the time to get to know the person, getting your financial situation in order, discussing what you both want for the future, and preparing yourself to be a wife or a husband then you aren’t too young.

If you’ve just prepared yourself for a wedding and fun times in la-la land then perhaps you have some things to consider.

People are really anti-marriage these days (pro-wedding; but anti-marriage) so as long as you have prepared yourself for things that last beyond the wedding then you are probably ready.

Good luck.


I really need to get into the wedding invitation business. Sure, it’s a competitive area; but brides spend so much on invites, envelopes, and custom lettering that it might be worth it.

Yes, I tend to be pro “save your money”, but there’s something about invitations that mesmerizes me. It’s probably because it’s a part of the stationary family and I love stationary. Don’t even get me started on my business card obsession, it’s a secret addiction.

What do you think about this for my next headline, “Bride Diva Does Invites”.

Too risqué?

Maybe I’ll just leave the wedding invitations to the pros like Wedding Paper Divas. No, that’s not my website but they do have some very diva-ish stuff.It’s very unique, but simple and classy at the same time.

As for the pricing, I’d say they are about average so they are definitely worth looking at.

By the way, be sure to look at the thank you cards because *ahem* I know how weddings tend to bring out the ungratefulness in people. “I want cash only..I don’t like that gift…I want it my way…it’s my day…wah, wah, wah”

And on that note, let me remind you again that you don’t have a year to say thank you, so get that myth right out of your head.

Stay classy!

Q: I want to have drinks at the reception but it’s not really in my budget. Is it ok to write byob [bring your own bottle] on the invites? How should I write it?

A: Ummmm no. Can we say tackhead? Are you having a wedding reception or a frat party?

There’s nothing wrong with having a reception sans alcohol. If you don’t want alcohol then don’t have alcohol. There’s no reason to make a big deal of it, people will find out when they get there.

Q: I am on a budget. While I’d love to invite all of my family, friends, and their friends I simply can’t. We can’t afford it. How do I tell people without hurting their feelings?

A: I know how that feels. I was a little touchy about the subject myself. Most people who have had a wedding will understand if you politely tell them that you have budget and/or space restraints. Other people won’t understand, and they will be offended.

Then there will be the people who you never would have thought to invite, and they’ll be offended that they didn’t get invited. You just have to be prepared to deal with it. Weddings bring out the diva in people and I mean the bad diva, not the divine diva.

If there is a way you can cut back on other (unnecessary) expenses in order to invite more people then try that. Trust me, having people share in your experience is more important than $200 per table flower arrangements.

However you do have a right to invite (or not invite) anyone you want so if someone is going to be offended because you have a budget then I’d have to question what kind of friend or relative they are.

Just make sure you don’t leave off anyone important like your grandma.

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